Many of you know that between 2021-2023, I faced a series of soul-crushing losses. 

First, after a lingering and awful illness, my mother died. Then my wonderful life partner, Mark, was gone in an instant with no warning. A series of further pains ensued, including a hurricane, a job change, the death of my beloved 17-year-old Sheltie, my own near-death experience, and in May 2023, my ex-husband suddenly died.

It felt like living a bad dream. I was the star of a melodrama; my life the lyrics to a sad country western song. Yet with each sucker punch, I'd quickly and deliberately pull myself up like Rocky vs. Apollo Creed. Instead of succumbing to sadness, a fierce resilience rose up.

You might think (and many did) that my response was admirable.  And on the surface, it appeared to be downright remarkable.I f

In retrospect, so desperate to find meaning in the madness, I wanted to be the poster child for how to handle grief. As if grief was a competition to be won!

I remember thinking, "I've GOT this!  I'll probably even write a book..."

...and then, SPLAT.  Over and over again.

Until I came to the end of myself.  And found the true me.

For those in a dark place, I have a new appreciation for you. And I understand that you might even wonder if you want to go on.

That's a tender space. 

Well-meaning friends and family desperately want to make things better for you.  They grasp for words of encouragement and usually come up empty. 

Because your battle is between you...and you.

But there is great power in surrounding yourself with loving people.  And I've found, there is power in the telling of stories that offer hope to keep going.

This series, The Alchemy of Pain, is not intended to build altars to dark times.  It's to shine a light on the souls who kept going THROUGH their valley of the shadow of death.

The valley is different for everyone.

Surviving the loss of a loved one.

Living as a military spouse with a partner deployed in combat.

Waking each day to chronic pain.

Or...fill in the blank.

The interviews will inspire you.  Because "If they can do it, so can I."

Each person's pain is valid.  It deserves to be seen and heard.  The feelings MUST be felt (as I eventually learned.)

But on the other side, what happens? 

Transformation.  

Changed forever...and for good.

These are not the stories we would have ever asked to tell. 

But they were what we were given.  And what we did with the pain?  These stories must be told.

Share The Alchemy of Pain with anyone you know who could use a little light at the end of their tunnel.

And if you know someone whose story needs to be told, e-mail me at brenda@brendaviola.com.